networking at events

networking…

it is the buzzword everyone swears by. like sugar in a cup of tea, it’s the one ingredient that’s supposed to make life sweeter. whether you’re seeking a career breakthrough, a friend, or even a romantic partner, it all starts with that first 'hi’.

some people are naturally good at it as if they were born with an effortless ability to connect. others, like me, struggle with it.

being introverted, every conversation is a cycle of overthinking; “what should i say? will they find me interesting? will i find them interesting? what if they ignore me?” and even if things go well, i’m left wondering, “what now?”

once, at an event, i struck up a conversation with one of the female speakers and asked a question that, in hindsight, i realize may have been a bit awkward. i’m not sure if it made her uncomfortable, but it felt a little off to me, and i regretted asking.

it made me reflect on how many times we, in our attempts to connect, might unintentionally make others uncomfortable. perhaps they don’t call it out because they don’t want to make things weird, or maybe they’re just trying to be polite.

my approach has always been to look for an obvious conversation starter; a pen i like, a black macbook, cool shoes, or even just a warm smile. sometimes, it works, and the conversation flows naturally. and then there are moments when i do find a good starting point but can’t seem to keep up, either because i’m drained or because the conversation just feels like it’s running out of steam, and neither of us knows how to keep it going.

for me, networking isn’t just about collecting contacts or making small talk. i crave deep, meaningful connections, across work, career, and life. i just haven’t figured out how to go from 0 to 100 with a total stranger, or 20.

every soul is beautiful; you just have to look deeper.

i’ll keep trying. and even though i fail many times, like i did at that event, i learn what not to do next time.

shout-out to those who make it easy to connect; with a smile, contagious energy, and a genuine willingness to get to know the other person. i hope i can be one of those people someday.

if you’ve got any tips, feel free to share. and while you’re at it,

what do you think about networking at events? yay or nay?